Say, whats that Terrible Smell in my Jacket?

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By John Burns

Dear MOby,

After a party at a new friend’s house last weekend, I decided to do the right thing and slept on the couch instead of riding home slightly inebriated. As punishment for that good deed, when I woke up early the next morning to make good my escape, I noticed an inescapable and pervasive odor wafting up into my helmet as I began to ride off. I managed to shrug it off as I was riding home, but when I stopped and removed my favorite old Vanson jacket, there it was again – cat pee! And plenty of it. I’ve tried a couple of cleaners but the memory of that night refuses to leave my jacket. What can I do to get rid of it? Will it go away over time? Help me…

Olfactory Rider


Dear Olaf,

My former cat, Bob, tried to warn me off my first ex wife by performing the same operation in her nice leather jacket very early in our relationship. This was a fashion-weight ladies’ garment that wasn’t going to put up with a lot of harsh chemicals and things, but it was also thrift-store and no great loss. Still, my ex seized upon the opportunity to get a new jacket after chastising Bob and me at length about the old one. After we were married, anytime there was unpleasantness, after things cooled down Bob would often give me that look from his end of the couch: See? I tried to warn you man.

Before we go any further, look inward and ask yourself if the feline in your story (most certainly a fellow male), was simply trying to offer you some good relationship advice?

If your jacket is truly soiled, don’t waste your time or money on any of the stuff they sell at pet stores to …read more

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